Lost and Found
Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2020 7:06 pm
Hello Friends,
After a long journey through my mind and corporate America, I have returned to my spiritual family here. A lot has changed since I was last here, some good, some bad, some may be shocking to others.
As I walked through the path of my life and worked through promotion after promotion clawing my way to the top I had a realization that I could not shake. Though I was good at the job I was doing it was draining all of my life and spiritual energy. Working in customer support is a very thankless and draining line of work especially if you feel any empathy at all. This is especially difficult when working with irate, scared, or irrational customers. You absorb everything you can to ease the situation and get everything in order but you are now dealing with all of the emotions you absorbed.
Over time, at least in my case, you get numb. You don't feel about anything, you don't want to feel about anything. Everything becomes dull and numb. No matter how hard I tried to shake this dull numbness of life that I was feeling I never felt like I was myself. Nothing that I liked mattered to me anymore, nothing was fun, I had stopped writing, in general I had stopped caring.
I did this job more or less for 23 years in different aspects of Information Technology from end user email accounts all the way to million dollar corporate accounts. I had worked my way up to a six figure salary with benefits out of this world, and plenty of paid vacation time. But... every time I took vacation I always dreaded having to go back.
But now I have all of the freedom in the world, I resigned from my engineering position and am technically now unemployed working towards self-employed. I am currently in the planning stages as I recharge my life energy and start to look at things in a different light, a younger light, the light I used before I started the 23 year crawl up the corporate ladder.
Some may think I am crazy, some may think this is a great thing. The only thing I can say is this is my thing, it is what I need to do to be the real me, maybe I will go back into engineering at some point, but maybe I will just forge a brand new path.
A bit more detail here in the blogpost I wrote about the same thing https://theinterneteffect.com/2020/10/0 ... y-you-die/
Peace and Happiness,
Bryan
After a long journey through my mind and corporate America, I have returned to my spiritual family here. A lot has changed since I was last here, some good, some bad, some may be shocking to others.
As I walked through the path of my life and worked through promotion after promotion clawing my way to the top I had a realization that I could not shake. Though I was good at the job I was doing it was draining all of my life and spiritual energy. Working in customer support is a very thankless and draining line of work especially if you feel any empathy at all. This is especially difficult when working with irate, scared, or irrational customers. You absorb everything you can to ease the situation and get everything in order but you are now dealing with all of the emotions you absorbed.
Over time, at least in my case, you get numb. You don't feel about anything, you don't want to feel about anything. Everything becomes dull and numb. No matter how hard I tried to shake this dull numbness of life that I was feeling I never felt like I was myself. Nothing that I liked mattered to me anymore, nothing was fun, I had stopped writing, in general I had stopped caring.
I did this job more or less for 23 years in different aspects of Information Technology from end user email accounts all the way to million dollar corporate accounts. I had worked my way up to a six figure salary with benefits out of this world, and plenty of paid vacation time. But... every time I took vacation I always dreaded having to go back.
But now I have all of the freedom in the world, I resigned from my engineering position and am technically now unemployed working towards self-employed. I am currently in the planning stages as I recharge my life energy and start to look at things in a different light, a younger light, the light I used before I started the 23 year crawl up the corporate ladder.
Some may think I am crazy, some may think this is a great thing. The only thing I can say is this is my thing, it is what I need to do to be the real me, maybe I will go back into engineering at some point, but maybe I will just forge a brand new path.
A bit more detail here in the blogpost I wrote about the same thing https://theinterneteffect.com/2020/10/0 ... y-you-die/
Peace and Happiness,
Bryan
