11:11, a second time around
Posted: Sat Jul 28, 2018 9:48 am
I'm not sure where is a good place to put this, since I'm fairly new to the board, but I guess I just wanted to jump right in and tell of my experience with 11:11 and the midwayers.
A few years ago I began to experience the 11:11 prompt. It was virtually everywhere, but mostly when it came to the clock on my phone and computer. At the time, I was mostly spending my time online, where I had a blog that had amassed over 40k followers. I mostly did advice on my blog, young black women would write to me about everything from relationships, feminism, and spirituality, and I would do my best to answer their questions, often in great depth and detail. I amassed a stellar reputation of giving loving advice that resonated deeply with people. I would get messages all day, every day about how much my words had shifted people's lives for the better, how I had opened them up to the possibilities of their greatest potential, and their immense gratitude towards me. Even though I struggled with my own issues of self esteem, and my romantic life was not what one would called stellar in any way, I was able to bypass that in order to help my followers. The experience gave me a sense of purpose, and looking back on it now, I'm sure that many of those long paragraphs were being channeled. Likely from my thought adjuster though I had no idea what that even was at the time. I expressed such depth of knowledge of with such patience and love towards these virtual strangers, part of which I'm sure was my nature, but also just felt bigger. My ability to amass such a platform so quickly was proof that there was something "special" about me, whether I chose to believe it or not. I believe it's that specialness that attracted the midwayers to me, or perhaps more than likely they have always been here, and just waiting for me to wake up to my own abilities.
I dabble in another spiritual modality called The Michael Teachings. There, I had a chart channeled for me that gave me a little bit more insight about my personality, purpose, but also my struggles. I began meditating daily, and had a few channeling sessions with the entity. They went well, I always appreciated the lax method of the teaching, the feeling that, "this is simply information, do with it what you will." They don't ask for prayer or allegiance, there's no real hierarchy, no real "leaders". As I recovered from modern day Christianity, where my questions were never satisfactorily answered and I often felt resentful and confused of what I knew of God, I felt drawn towards the teachings. Anyway, eventually through more research and again after receiving the 11:11 prompt, I came upon The Urantia Book and began communicating with a fairly famous channel, Chris Maurus.
In the time I learned a lot, but was also going through a deep grief period as I had lost my mother only months prior. I thought I was "fine" but I really wasn't, and I believe that latent grief coupled perhaps with some spiritual interference that I still don't fully understand, and the regular use of marijuana, I suffered an extreme psychotic break and was hospitalized after one scary night of paranoia and hallucinations. I still feel a pit in my stomach when I think of that horrible time. The doctors diagnosed me with Bi-Polar disorder and told me I had had a schizophrenic episode. I can't shake the feeling that something was "on me" or "in me" and my issues were more than just psychological, but spiritual as well. I am slowly coming around to the understanding that I may not ever fully understand what happened to me, but the years since I have spent recovering.
There was a period where the prompts stopped, and in my fear I turned away from all things remotely spiritual, cut off contact with the few people aware of this phenomenon, deleted my blog, and stopped reading the teachings. I completely ignored it existed and stopped doing any real spiritual upkeep, such as visualizations where I would invite my guardians in, crystal healing, aura cleansing and the like. That fear still hasn't completely gone away, but I feel as though I am slowly resurfacing after a long, deep, dark period of stagnation and rest, and ready to recover completely. I have also began to see 11:11 again, not with the every day frequency as before but with enough for me to know that these lovely guardians are aware of me and that I am also ready to explore what we began so long ago. I feel like I have finally began to 'check in' not only with the midwayers but also with myself, and I was searching for a sense of community and understanding.
There's a lot that is overwhelming about this teaching, I still have a significant amount of Christian Guilt, being raised Jehovah's Witness there is so much fear, with everyone believing that this is still Satan's system, and anything that deviates from their strict teaching is the work of evil forces. But, I'm working through it. Despite that beep-beep of fear there is also a deep understanding that I have a certain purpose, that platforms come easy to me because I'm worthy of them. That I am a good and fair person, and willing to be of service to mankind as I was on my blog. Honestly I feel that part of my purpose is absorbing and understanding this information so that I may translate it in a way that people like myself (young, black women) may be able to understand and apply it. In my culture, the hold of standard christianity is like a chokehold, there is so much judgement and fear, and it's compounded by racial divides. I wish to use whatever ability and help I've been given to spread this message of universal love in a way that people who have shared my experiences can understand. I feel like I'm taking the tiniest of baby steps towards that, starting with writing this here and hoping to be welcomed into this space so that I can learn.
Anyway, thank you for reading if you've made it this far and I am so glad I am being prompted again!
A few years ago I began to experience the 11:11 prompt. It was virtually everywhere, but mostly when it came to the clock on my phone and computer. At the time, I was mostly spending my time online, where I had a blog that had amassed over 40k followers. I mostly did advice on my blog, young black women would write to me about everything from relationships, feminism, and spirituality, and I would do my best to answer their questions, often in great depth and detail. I amassed a stellar reputation of giving loving advice that resonated deeply with people. I would get messages all day, every day about how much my words had shifted people's lives for the better, how I had opened them up to the possibilities of their greatest potential, and their immense gratitude towards me. Even though I struggled with my own issues of self esteem, and my romantic life was not what one would called stellar in any way, I was able to bypass that in order to help my followers. The experience gave me a sense of purpose, and looking back on it now, I'm sure that many of those long paragraphs were being channeled. Likely from my thought adjuster though I had no idea what that even was at the time. I expressed such depth of knowledge of with such patience and love towards these virtual strangers, part of which I'm sure was my nature, but also just felt bigger. My ability to amass such a platform so quickly was proof that there was something "special" about me, whether I chose to believe it or not. I believe it's that specialness that attracted the midwayers to me, or perhaps more than likely they have always been here, and just waiting for me to wake up to my own abilities.
I dabble in another spiritual modality called The Michael Teachings. There, I had a chart channeled for me that gave me a little bit more insight about my personality, purpose, but also my struggles. I began meditating daily, and had a few channeling sessions with the entity. They went well, I always appreciated the lax method of the teaching, the feeling that, "this is simply information, do with it what you will." They don't ask for prayer or allegiance, there's no real hierarchy, no real "leaders". As I recovered from modern day Christianity, where my questions were never satisfactorily answered and I often felt resentful and confused of what I knew of God, I felt drawn towards the teachings. Anyway, eventually through more research and again after receiving the 11:11 prompt, I came upon The Urantia Book and began communicating with a fairly famous channel, Chris Maurus.
In the time I learned a lot, but was also going through a deep grief period as I had lost my mother only months prior. I thought I was "fine" but I really wasn't, and I believe that latent grief coupled perhaps with some spiritual interference that I still don't fully understand, and the regular use of marijuana, I suffered an extreme psychotic break and was hospitalized after one scary night of paranoia and hallucinations. I still feel a pit in my stomach when I think of that horrible time. The doctors diagnosed me with Bi-Polar disorder and told me I had had a schizophrenic episode. I can't shake the feeling that something was "on me" or "in me" and my issues were more than just psychological, but spiritual as well. I am slowly coming around to the understanding that I may not ever fully understand what happened to me, but the years since I have spent recovering.
There was a period where the prompts stopped, and in my fear I turned away from all things remotely spiritual, cut off contact with the few people aware of this phenomenon, deleted my blog, and stopped reading the teachings. I completely ignored it existed and stopped doing any real spiritual upkeep, such as visualizations where I would invite my guardians in, crystal healing, aura cleansing and the like. That fear still hasn't completely gone away, but I feel as though I am slowly resurfacing after a long, deep, dark period of stagnation and rest, and ready to recover completely. I have also began to see 11:11 again, not with the every day frequency as before but with enough for me to know that these lovely guardians are aware of me and that I am also ready to explore what we began so long ago. I feel like I have finally began to 'check in' not only with the midwayers but also with myself, and I was searching for a sense of community and understanding.
There's a lot that is overwhelming about this teaching, I still have a significant amount of Christian Guilt, being raised Jehovah's Witness there is so much fear, with everyone believing that this is still Satan's system, and anything that deviates from their strict teaching is the work of evil forces. But, I'm working through it. Despite that beep-beep of fear there is also a deep understanding that I have a certain purpose, that platforms come easy to me because I'm worthy of them. That I am a good and fair person, and willing to be of service to mankind as I was on my blog. Honestly I feel that part of my purpose is absorbing and understanding this information so that I may translate it in a way that people like myself (young, black women) may be able to understand and apply it. In my culture, the hold of standard christianity is like a chokehold, there is so much judgement and fear, and it's compounded by racial divides. I wish to use whatever ability and help I've been given to spread this message of universal love in a way that people who have shared my experiences can understand. I feel like I'm taking the tiniest of baby steps towards that, starting with writing this here and hoping to be welcomed into this space so that I can learn.
Anyway, thank you for reading if you've made it this far and I am so glad I am being prompted again!
In fact, just the opposite...I was enthralled. I kept nodding my head as you spoke about your blog and the readers who benefited. You demonstrated unconditional love...reflected it and so...your words became so much more... You allowed the Divine to work and move through you and I suspect still do even though your blog is long closed.
