Please Help Me. My Name is Luke. Please Help.
Posted: Wed Nov 05, 2014 3:16 pm
Hello,
My name is Luke. I am 21 years old.
Over the last few months, I have been seeing 10:10 11:11 12:12 1:11 2:22 3:33 4:44 5:55 alot. I started screen shot-ing it on my phone and after now its just not even a thing. I literally Just see it all the time, I wish I could attach all 45 screen shots that I have from the last 5-6 weeks. (The screen shots do not represent the only times I have seen this) The first 2 weeks I took alot and now its just normal for me, its like not even a thing anymore. Look at the clock "O surprise surprise its 11:11"
I have also been having some strange dreams. One in particular that was incredibly vivid. (about 3-4 weeks ago)
It was if I was stuck in a loop of dying, as if that when I died in the dream I was teleported to a parallel universe to experience another death, I experienced about 30 of my deaths that night. I was aware in the dream that I was stuck in a loop of dying and each time I awoke moments before my death in a 'new universe' I tired to tell whoever was around me what was going on. In one in particular I died of lung cancer. I signaled to the doctors to take out my tubing that was breathing for me and the only words I could say to my mum were 'you have no idea what is happening to me.' And bang off to experience the next death. I was shot, stabbed, beaten, hit by cars, waking up in hospitals to give my last words to my grieving family. One poor soul said to me 'It will stop eventually, but you just have to wait.'
Finally I had experienced my last death. I was taken to a gate by a couple of 'people', but as they crossed through the gate I could not. I was not told I could not come across. I just could not cross.
I was taken up as if I had no control of my directory through space and on my way I tried to take as many things as I could with me. When I arrived at the gates I was met by human like beings, I could feel their power, intelligence and wisdom, understading and happiness. They laughed at me, trying to take money across the 'border,' trying to throw things over the gate which I could not pass. Standing on the other side of the gate was what I now believe to be god, an almighty being that I could just sense was beyond comprehension.
I was so mad at him, I told him 'how dare you take me, how dare you take me, HOW DARE YOU TAKE ME.' I yelled at him. 'I am not ready yet, I AM NOT READY YET.' He was just smiling and laughing. He told me that my money and my belongings were no good there.
I told him 'You must let me go back, I am not finished yet, I have more to do, more to learn, more to teach." He told me if that's what I really wanted he would, he sent me back. I awoke in hospital with my mum next to my bed and I told her "Its ok mum I met him, I met him mum, I met god. With that I woke up. Scared out of my beep-beep mind.
It is currently 2014. In 2011 I attempted suicide. I cut. I cut everywhere. Horizontally. From my wrists all the way up my arms, all over my torso, my legs, my face, my head. The big cuts being at my wrists and thighs (where I thought I would bleed from the most.) I had over 100 cuts on my body, 90 of them being pussy cuts, superficial bull beep-beep cuts, at the time it made me mad. I knew I had to cut deeper to die. So I did the cuts on my wrists and thighs were the worst, requiring over 50 stitches.
That night I dont remember dreaming, I dont remember falling asleep. After I had finished cutting. I put down the knife and lie on my bed. I lied in the bed that I had made for myself. I awoke to my sister screaming 'Luke NO, LUKE NO, LUKE NO. They called an ambulance. I was taken to hospital where I was made physiologically stable and was then carted off in an ambulance followed by a police car to a Mental Hospital where I spent the next week.
I beleive it was this night something happened. Something, someone, somewhere was looking over me that night and from then on. Strange things have always happened to me. I see unexplainable things all the time. Usually shadows patches of light whizzing around. And now over the last few weeks this. I feel a pressence around me always, sometimes a cool breeze that makes my hair stand up, some times i feel as if its right behind me looking over my shoulder. I can feel it here. It shares my joy, empathisises my depression, calms me down when I need it, hypes me up when I need it.
I grew up in a family where money was very tight, very very tight. We had none. So now, naturally, all I want is money. During a session of mediation I was on the topic of money. And I was asked by a voice that was not my own, "Why do you want the money Luke?" I answered "to help, to help everyone that has no money." Nothing was said but I just felt like it was the wrong answer, like as if I obtained money that I wouldn't use it to help. I would become greedy. Again it asked "Why do you want the money Luke?" I answered 'To live it up.' Again now words but I just felt that I had gotten the question wrong and I felt shame. Again it asked, "Why do you want the money Luke?" I answered 'security.' I felt that this was the right answer, that whatever was asking me questions without words had told me that it was the right asnwer. That session of meditiation taught me alot about myself. Before this expreience, I have never heard a voice in my head that wasnt my own. It was a deep voice, a very deep voice, it sort of echoed. A few days later, as I was going to sleep. I heard another voice that wasnt my own. It was the voice of a child. A male child. He said to me. "I am Mary's boyfriend." So I said who's Marry and all I heard is what sounded like a classroom of children chanting 'Mary, Mary, Mary, Mary.'
I don't know a Mary, and I dont know who Mary or her boyfriend is. As you can imagine this freaked me out alot too.
Any help would be much appreciated, anything. Whether you are going to tell me I see 10:10, 11:11, 12:12, 1:11, 2:22, 3:33, 4:44, 5:55 becauase its mathmatics, statistics. Or whether you have something else for me. I am looking for answers.
Before this happened. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Now I know exactly what I want, and almost exaclty how to get that as if I have been given a map.
I know this sounds so strange. I am scared to talk to anyone about it because I dont want to be deemed 'Insane'
Please help me make sense of this.
Please help me.
Luke
My name is Luke. I am 21 years old.
Over the last few months, I have been seeing 10:10 11:11 12:12 1:11 2:22 3:33 4:44 5:55 alot. I started screen shot-ing it on my phone and after now its just not even a thing. I literally Just see it all the time, I wish I could attach all 45 screen shots that I have from the last 5-6 weeks. (The screen shots do not represent the only times I have seen this) The first 2 weeks I took alot and now its just normal for me, its like not even a thing anymore. Look at the clock "O surprise surprise its 11:11"
I have also been having some strange dreams. One in particular that was incredibly vivid. (about 3-4 weeks ago)
It was if I was stuck in a loop of dying, as if that when I died in the dream I was teleported to a parallel universe to experience another death, I experienced about 30 of my deaths that night. I was aware in the dream that I was stuck in a loop of dying and each time I awoke moments before my death in a 'new universe' I tired to tell whoever was around me what was going on. In one in particular I died of lung cancer. I signaled to the doctors to take out my tubing that was breathing for me and the only words I could say to my mum were 'you have no idea what is happening to me.' And bang off to experience the next death. I was shot, stabbed, beaten, hit by cars, waking up in hospitals to give my last words to my grieving family. One poor soul said to me 'It will stop eventually, but you just have to wait.'
Finally I had experienced my last death. I was taken to a gate by a couple of 'people', but as they crossed through the gate I could not. I was not told I could not come across. I just could not cross.
I was taken up as if I had no control of my directory through space and on my way I tried to take as many things as I could with me. When I arrived at the gates I was met by human like beings, I could feel their power, intelligence and wisdom, understading and happiness. They laughed at me, trying to take money across the 'border,' trying to throw things over the gate which I could not pass. Standing on the other side of the gate was what I now believe to be god, an almighty being that I could just sense was beyond comprehension.
I was so mad at him, I told him 'how dare you take me, how dare you take me, HOW DARE YOU TAKE ME.' I yelled at him. 'I am not ready yet, I AM NOT READY YET.' He was just smiling and laughing. He told me that my money and my belongings were no good there.
I told him 'You must let me go back, I am not finished yet, I have more to do, more to learn, more to teach." He told me if that's what I really wanted he would, he sent me back. I awoke in hospital with my mum next to my bed and I told her "Its ok mum I met him, I met him mum, I met god. With that I woke up. Scared out of my beep-beep mind.
It is currently 2014. In 2011 I attempted suicide. I cut. I cut everywhere. Horizontally. From my wrists all the way up my arms, all over my torso, my legs, my face, my head. The big cuts being at my wrists and thighs (where I thought I would bleed from the most.) I had over 100 cuts on my body, 90 of them being pussy cuts, superficial bull beep-beep cuts, at the time it made me mad. I knew I had to cut deeper to die. So I did the cuts on my wrists and thighs were the worst, requiring over 50 stitches.
That night I dont remember dreaming, I dont remember falling asleep. After I had finished cutting. I put down the knife and lie on my bed. I lied in the bed that I had made for myself. I awoke to my sister screaming 'Luke NO, LUKE NO, LUKE NO. They called an ambulance. I was taken to hospital where I was made physiologically stable and was then carted off in an ambulance followed by a police car to a Mental Hospital where I spent the next week.
I beleive it was this night something happened. Something, someone, somewhere was looking over me that night and from then on. Strange things have always happened to me. I see unexplainable things all the time. Usually shadows patches of light whizzing around. And now over the last few weeks this. I feel a pressence around me always, sometimes a cool breeze that makes my hair stand up, some times i feel as if its right behind me looking over my shoulder. I can feel it here. It shares my joy, empathisises my depression, calms me down when I need it, hypes me up when I need it.
I grew up in a family where money was very tight, very very tight. We had none. So now, naturally, all I want is money. During a session of mediation I was on the topic of money. And I was asked by a voice that was not my own, "Why do you want the money Luke?" I answered "to help, to help everyone that has no money." Nothing was said but I just felt like it was the wrong answer, like as if I obtained money that I wouldn't use it to help. I would become greedy. Again it asked "Why do you want the money Luke?" I answered 'To live it up.' Again now words but I just felt that I had gotten the question wrong and I felt shame. Again it asked, "Why do you want the money Luke?" I answered 'security.' I felt that this was the right answer, that whatever was asking me questions without words had told me that it was the right asnwer. That session of meditiation taught me alot about myself. Before this expreience, I have never heard a voice in my head that wasnt my own. It was a deep voice, a very deep voice, it sort of echoed. A few days later, as I was going to sleep. I heard another voice that wasnt my own. It was the voice of a child. A male child. He said to me. "I am Mary's boyfriend." So I said who's Marry and all I heard is what sounded like a classroom of children chanting 'Mary, Mary, Mary, Mary.'
I don't know a Mary, and I dont know who Mary or her boyfriend is. As you can imagine this freaked me out alot too.
Any help would be much appreciated, anything. Whether you are going to tell me I see 10:10, 11:11, 12:12, 1:11, 2:22, 3:33, 4:44, 5:55 becauase its mathmatics, statistics. Or whether you have something else for me. I am looking for answers.
Before this happened. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Now I know exactly what I want, and almost exaclty how to get that as if I have been given a map.
I know this sounds so strange. I am scared to talk to anyone about it because I dont want to be deemed 'Insane'
Please help me make sense of this.
Please help me.
Luke