https://board.1111angels.com/viewtopic.php?t=34214
I am growing fond of the circle of seven, and teacher Ophelius.
I replaced the words to accept more ownership for the suffering and lack of understanding.
I met a beautiful woman recently. I found her impressive.
Well, our short experience together also brought my addictive personality to light. I was heartbroken as a result of my own behavior, where the selfish me sprouted monstrous proportions. I am learning that this disorder is real, like a person addicted to a substance- the brain seeks a sense of satisfaction(like a dopamine hit) despite the reality of a situation(causing regrettable action if not addressed and understood).
I am ashamed for not behaving more in tune with the inspiration I've been blessed to receive. I learned she too is prompted by 1111. That should have been my clue to subdue the selfish desires, but even then- my sexual attraction was intense.
I understand much of the suffering comes not just from a lack of understanding but from seeking false liberation(living for the ego) instead of seeking true liberation (seeking and accepting the Fathers Will)
Now I've lost a beautiful connection and opportunity to make a wonderful friend.
I intend to endure, and hope to grow. This prayer is something I will practice, again and again. I do think despite all of this, understanding is coming to light... And though I've received illumination- I must transform.
That's all, for now.

