Send For Foreign Soil

Post any poetry here. It's just too hard to define "inspired" in this context, so we will settle for that which inspires.
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overmind
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Send For Foreign Soil

Post by overmind » Tue Mar 18, 2014 8:36 pm

Oh tree of knowledge,
Oh tree of ages,
Oh Yggdrasil of worldy spoil.

See that the point
Which sports in vain
Becomes not me
In finite frame.

Oh great tree of cleft branch,
Oh trite giant of split prong,
Oh Yggdrasil of fault.

Bear not my frame
Nor my true name,
For your held stars
Are inept sons.

Oh tree of wisdom,
Oh tree of sages,
Oh Yggdrasil of earthly toil.

See that the point
Which drains disdain
Becomes not me
In ageless reign.

Oh poor tree of torn leaf,
Oh trite plant of rived frond,
Oh Yggdrasil of rot.

Bear not my reign
Nor my true name,
For your held stars
Are idle sons.

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Re: Send for Foreign Soil

Post by overmind » Tue Mar 18, 2014 8:40 pm

Number of lines in each stanza alternates between 3 and 4. The strange meter goes 558 4444 666 4444. If the syllables from each stanza are all added, it alternates between 18 and 16.

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Re: Send For Foreign Soil

Post by Sandy » Wed Mar 19, 2014 5:15 am

Hey Arthur,
This one sounds like one created for the epic. I like its flow. It has a "other worldly" quality. I find myself transported as I read it quietly and the feelings the speaker expresses have been familiar to me. Regardless of what time you live...it is not pleasant to feel stuck or stagnant with life flowing all around you and onwards without you. Well anyway, that is what I took out of it. LOL I may have missed the point completely. ;)
love,
Sandy
Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.

~ Chief Seattle ~

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Re: Send For Foreign Soil

Post by overmind » Wed Mar 19, 2014 5:45 am

The last two poems were simply things I wanted to make. The first one may find its place in my writing (perhaps part 5), but the second does not really fit as Yggdrasil comes from Norse mythology. The first came bursting out of my head as the first two stanzas almost wrote themselves when I was away from home. The second took more thought, but still didn't take too long to put together.

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Re: Send For Foreign Soil

Post by Sandy » Thu Mar 20, 2014 3:50 am

It would take me a year to write poetry of this calibre and even then it wouldn't be half as nice. ;) You have a wonderful gift Arthur. We are blessed that you continue to nurture it and share on this board. :happy
love,
Sandy
Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.

~ Chief Seattle ~

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Re: Send For Foreign Soil

Post by overmind » Thu Mar 20, 2014 4:32 am

It's kind of like writing code, but easier. Follow these steps:

Decide what you want your poem to be about. Decide if you want it to rhyme or not. If so, decide what rhyming pattern you want (abab, aabb, abcabc, aaaa, abba, abacada, etc). Decide if you want a certain rhythm/meter in your poem (the number of syllables per line) or if you want to go free verse. Decide if you want certain themes or words to be brought up in a specific order. Decide how long you want it and how you want the stanzas to be organized. Start writing. Look for a word's synonyms if the language doesn't seem to convey the right meaning or sound.

I spend half of my time looking for the right synonym/antonym on thesaurus.com or checking definitions through google. A poem like the one above can be completed in as little as thirty minutes. It's not as difficult as it may look if you practice. The hardest thing is keeping a specific rhyming pattern, meter and length because it severely limits what you can express. Creating free verse poetry that rolls off the tongue is also difficult, but not as much.

If you give it a try, I can then give you some help.

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Re: Send For Foreign Soil

Post by Sandy » Fri Mar 21, 2014 4:16 am

:D hey thanks for that... I have copied it and placed it in my folder of special things so I can refer back to it in case this thread disappears. (which sadly it does rather quickly in this forum.)
I must admit though the process still seems quite complex. This is an area I found lacking at my high school. I suppose my English and literary teachers did not stay any length of time on poetry as I can never remember being taught any of this or being asked to write any form of poetry. We wrote tons... lots of essays, term papers, thesis etc... but no poetry... very sad. :( Of course that is all meaningless because I have forgotten a great deal over the years. :roll: )

Okay a question...
You wrote:
If so, decide what rhyming pattern you want (abab, aabb, abcabc, aaaa, abba, abacada, etc).
I'm not sure what you are talking about here, ( :lol: Yep, as a tutor you would have your work cut out for you with this one. ;) )

I can see there is a lot more pre organization that goes into a poem then I realized. I should have known this because even with a simple essay there is usually a plan in place before writing.

Thanks for the offer to help. I may take you up on it one of these days.
love,
Sandy
Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.

~ Chief Seattle ~

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Re: Send For Foreign Soil

Post by overmind » Fri Mar 21, 2014 4:58 am

I developed my skill in poetry through a college course, though it actually had more to do with interpreting poetry. Rhyming poems usually rhyme with the last syllable of each line, so it is important to figure out this rhyming pattern. I will show you different rhyming patterns, though these are not real poems. The matching letters simply signify the matching rhymes at the end of each sentence. Such patterns can stop when they are done, or they can keep going. You can also switch patterns in another stanza, or even in the same stanza (though this could trip up the readers).

Regular styles:

(abab)

I flew a kite.
I built a barn.
I will take flight.
I need more yarn.

(aabb)

I flew a kite.
I will take flight.
I built a barn.
I need more yarn.

(aaaa)

I flew a kite.
I will take flight.
I'll win this fight.
I'll shine the light.

Some lesser used forms (which do not always sound good):

(abba)

I flew a kite.
I built a barn.
I need more yarn.
I will take flight.

(abcabc)

I flew a kite.
I built a barn.
I will go run.
I will take flight.
I need more yarn.
I'll have more fun.

(abacada)

I flew a kite.
I built a barn.
I will take flight.
I'll have more fun.
I'll win this fight.
Nothing for sure.
I'll shine the light.


In the last one, only every other line rhymes. Notice that every line from these examples had four syllables. A fixed number of syllables for each line is called a meter. It is similar to how music is structured. You need to make sure that rhyming pairs have the same meter, or number of syllables. You can alternate between lines, but when two lines have that ending which rhymes, in most cases they should be the same length. However, an entire stanza (which looks like a separate paragraph in the poem) is best with the same meter throughout. That will make the poem exceptionally easy to read. In free verse, you are not really constrained. There are no rules. But in order for the reader to make sense of it, there should be some form of consistent order. One thing that I do occasionally is have lines from two different stanzas rhyme together (nothing within each stanza rhyming, the pattern would be "ab ab" or "abc abc"), and then have these separated by other stanzas which follow different rules.

All in all, you are trying to restructure your language so that the reader gains more value from it. You are delivering more emotion than if the text was read like a sentence.

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Re: Send For Foreign Soil

Post by Sandy » Fri Mar 21, 2014 6:14 am

Ah ha! :idea: I get it now! It's really simple after you explained it that way with examples. :D ( I put that in the folder too. )
As an exercise, I will take a good look at all the poems in this little book of poetry my mom gave me and see if I can identify the meter and the rhyming pattern.
Thank you! What fun! :bana:
love,
Sandy
Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.

~ Chief Seattle ~

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