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poet · Post by **poet** » Mon Aug 31, 2009 11:08 pm

Hi, this is my first time posting although I am a long time lurker. Although I have been absent for a few months. I've been seeing 1111 and various numbers for years, my personal ones are 444 and 11:44, I see those the most even getting woken up at those times. Anyway, its my understanding that sometimes they prompt us just so we know we aren't alone. I just want to know whats the point if we are still alone. I dont know, i think im just making this post out of severe depression. I'm always alone and never really have anyone to talk to. I do have friends, not dating anyone right now, mom dead, father emotionally absent and when around down right critical. Sometimes I feel so lonely i just want to die. The wanting to die feeling is been getting stronger and stronger. I know I shouldnt rely on people to make myself feel better. But I just crave at least one person to have a soul to soul conversation with. I think that is my problem, im too intense and too sensitive. I crave a deepness that I will never get. Sorry, Im only posting this to make myself feel better. Just trying to reach out to someone. Thanks for your time.
Poet.

Post by **Geoff** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 12:35 am

Dear Poet,

I am sorry to hear you feel so alone. Its hard for me to relate to, even though I live alone, so I must say I am sorry to hear you feel so estranged.

You will find lots of friends here, and you can also be sure the angels are very keen to be good friends with you.

love,
Geoff.

Twinstars · Post by **Twinstars** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:04 am

Hello Poet, you certainly have reached in the right direction. I'm John. No WAY you're more depressed than me. Why last night felt so low I had to stand on a dime just reach the curb. And if that weren't enough, while in a semi-conscious state I overheard someone saying that for now I should be treated as invisible!:oops: So if it makes you feel any better at all, feel free Anytime to use me as your personal paradigm of hope.

Okay, that said, you've stated you are a long time lurker. If that truly is the case then you already know you belong to a loving and growing family here. And with even a minimal amount of effort on your part, you're going to have more attention than you can handle. Noone here will judge either because we've learned to look at one another as souls on the same path to Paradise. Some of us are running, some walking. And Some of us still are bumping into curbs...

So don't be too hasty about never finding the deepness you crave so, I've known it to get P r e t t y deep here...

Cheer up my friend, your Midwayer family might have been prompting you all along as a way of keeping you from Feeling alone, but the real point might just be that you have finally joined with your Extended family.

Love, John.

poet · Post by **poet** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 1:54 am

Thank you guys

Twinstars you are funny lol. I do feel better already. This is such a warm place with seemingly nice people. That is why I chose to delurk here.

One thing about me is that I am very shy. I think this is probably like one of my first posts on any board. Just because I am behind a computer screen doesn't mean I become more outgoing. Online or Offline I am exactly the same. Well hopefully now I can ask questions that really pertain to this site. Thanks guys. First step into becoming less alone is to probably reach out more. Common sense, duh...but it eludes me.

Twinstars · Post by **Twinstars** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 4:19 am

And don't be afraid, or too shy, to jump in on the other threads. I'm sure you have more to offer than you are aware of my friend. People seem to un-shy quickly here.

Blessings...

justylonging1111 · Post by **justylonging1111** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 9:55 am

Dear Poet!

Welcome! I am so thrilled you decided to post!

I feel a strong connection to you through this and most definetely felt your soul! In fact, I am having a feeling like we have met before...

I also have in my life been very shy and found it hard to find someone to speak with reguarding the deep yearnings of my soul, and most times with an inability to express these feelings in words! It DOES get easier with time and with these loving people to share with, you will be filled with an amazing love to be treasure for a LONG time to come....

This very thing is what is drawing us together!

Think of the joy the Angels have experienced through your first post here!

I look forward to you sharing your experiences with us, Poet!

God Bless You and YOurs! We are One

Love Tannis

Post by **Sandy** » Tue Sep 01, 2009 10:29 am

Hello Poet,
You have made the first step and one of the toughest for us shy people...opening up and making a first post. When I came to the board, a few years ago now, I too was very shy and likened posting for the first time to a child walking into a playground for the first time. There are all these faces that you don't know and the fear that they will not like the way you look, or dress, or in this case write...But one thing I have noticed from the wonderful group of people who post here is that they are very supportive and caring and will fly to your aid at the drop of "John's dime" when you are floundering. That is worth its weight in gold as there are times its hard to see over a particular life hurdle. but sometimes the simple act of sharing and releasing helps to begin the healing. Of course we still must find our own answers but it is nice to know we have friends beside us who searching as well.

We may not be there in front of you in the physical, but to tell you the truth, I have come to discover that it isn't really all that important when the "airways" are filled with love...

I am sure you will have a lot to contribute to this lovely place and I look forward to getting to know you. Welcome Poet!
Love,
Sandy

Bluebelle235 · Post by **Bluebelle235** » Wed Sep 02, 2009 3:29 am

Hello Poet and *welcome*

Please don't feel alone, we are all here and if you are receiving prompts, then you are certainly not alone !!!

Much love to you,
Joy >i<

sleepyhead11 · Post by **sleepyhead11** » Wed Sep 02, 2009 6:21 am

Hi Poet. I think you will learn pretty quickly that you are never alone. Especially around here! Welcome new friend

Peace, Love, and Blessings.

sleepyhead11 · Post by **sleepyhead11** » Wed Sep 02, 2009 6:40 am

Your post reminded me a of a song I can't seem to stop listening to lately. It's a song called "Not Alone" by Darren Criss made popular by "A Very Potter Musical", a full length musical about Harry Potter which can be seen on youtube. The song is fantastic and isn't really Harry Potter related except for the books strong focus on friendship. It makes me smile and hopefully it will make you smile as well.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Za_ViWF ... re=channel

Lyrics: GINNY:
Ive been alone
surrounded by darkness
and Ive seen how heartless
the world can be

And Ive seen you crying
you felt like its hopeless
Ill always do my best
to make you see

That Harry, youre not alone
cause youre here with me
and nothings ever gonna bring us down
cause nothing can keep me from lovin you
and you know its true
it dont matter whatll come to be
our love is all we need to make it through

Now I know it aint easy
(HARRY: No it aint easy)
But it aint hard trying
(HARRY: its so hard trying)
everytime I see you smiling
and I feel you so close to me
tell me

GINNY & HARRY:
That baby youre not alone
cause youre here with me
and nothings ever gonna bring us down
cause nothing can keep me from lovin you
and you know its true
it dont matter whatll come to be
our love is all we need to make it through

HARRY:
Now I still have trouble
I trip and stumble
trying to make sense of things some times
I look for reasons
but I dont need em
all I need is to look in your eyes
and I realize

RON: Hey Harry!
HARRY: You guys came back.

HARRY, RON, HERMIONE, & GINNY:
Baby youre not alone
cause youre here with me
and nothings ever gonna bring us down
cause nothing can keep me from lovin you
and you know its true
it dont matter whatll come to be
our love is all we need to make it through

Dialogue

HARRY:
Cause it dont matter whatll come to be
our love is all we need to make it through

Daddy - O · Post by **Daddy - O** » Wed Sep 02, 2009 8:59 am

Hey Poet,

Great to meet you

. I too am very familar with feeling alone and depressed...and the need to have meaningful conversations with others who are like-minded. Well, until you come across those who you feel comfortable sharing your thoughts with, you can always come here and talk about things.....there are some really great people here who love discussing those deep matters of the soul.

Glad that your posting and no longer lurking

.

love,
Daddy - O

brianm · Post by **brianm** » Wed Sep 02, 2009 11:18 am

Hi Poet.

You said,

I know I shouldnt rely on people to make myself feel better.

Nothing could be further from the truth! One of our prime responsibilities in life is to see to the needs of one another....... and that's a two-way street! Do not hide, but reach out (just as you are doing) so that others can do what we are all meant to do.
I am new here as well, but can clearly see that this place is bursting at the seams with very helpful, knowlegeable, caring folks. You have certainly "delurked" in the right place.

Cheers, Brian.

Mamo · Post by **Mamo** » Wed Sep 02, 2009 10:41 pm

Hi Poet

Welcome

This site vibrates love from people all around the world.

I really hope you get yourself out of that dark cloud soon.
Only you can do that, allow the light back in, and it seems you've already taken the first step

{= Hugs =}
Mahsa

Petra Wilson · Post by **Petra Wilson** » Thu Sep 03, 2009 4:11 pm

Dear Poet, I understand how you feel. Perhaps not exactly?

I'm going to send you a big, soppy, huuuuuuge, snuggly snuggly, hug and a sloppy great kiss on your cheek! Did you get it??? Did it help?? I hope so.

{{{{{{{{{{{{poet}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Love, Petra xxx

~*Star_Struck*~ · Post by **~*Star_Struck*~** » Fri Sep 04, 2009 5:41 am

poet wrote:Hi, this is my first time posting although I am a long time lurker. Although I have been absent for a few months. I've been seeing 1111 and various numbers for years, my personal ones are 444 and 11:44, I see those the most even getting woken up at those times. Anyway, its my understanding that sometimes they prompt us just so we know we aren't alone. I just want to know whats the point if we are still alone. I dont know, i think im just making this post out of severe depression. I'm always alone and never really have anyone to talk to. I do have friends, not dating anyone right now, mom dead, father emotionally absent and when around down right critical. Sometimes I feel so lonely i just want to die. The wanting to die feeling is been getting stronger and stronger. I know I shouldnt rely on people to make myself feel better. But I just crave at least one person to have a soul to soul conversation with. I think that is my problem, im too intense and too sensitive. I crave a deepness that I will never get. Sorry, Im only posting this to make myself feel better. Just trying to reach out to someone. Thanks for your time.
Poet.

Dear Poet
You are not alone, friend!

I too have suffered terrible depression for as long as i can remember. There are days that i find so hard.. but i have found that love is the balm for my wounds, so to speak. I feel for you when you say that you are too sensitive, this is a problem i experience as well.. You will find no more loving, kind, beautiful people than those who are on this site. It's love that bonds us all together. This board, and all the information it contains, has helped me to take huge steps spiritually as well as form lasting bonds. I'm saying a prayer that it will help you too.

Do you have any kind of outlet? Ie writing, painting, music, sports? Sometimes it really helps just to get it out.
You say that you are prompted with :44, well you are definitely not alone!! I think you are loved very much.

I'm sending you hugs as well

Love
Star

Min · Post by **Min** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 4:03 am

Your not alone poet if it were just that easy people would stand in the subway to feel better...you are lonely...and God is so near a lonely person, that's why there is only one set of footprints in the sand...try getting your juices pumping...walk, dance, live...healthy body=healthy mind...kick urself in the seratonin butt maybe ur chemicals need some assistance to regain balance. We are also hormonal beings so don't be so quick to not find a more logical explanation...a good cry, a needed scream, some comfort food...i translate "i wanna die" into "i wanna new life" if you wern't looking for something amazing in life why would you be so disappointed in not finding it...you want to live my friend so love and laugh...I'm always here sweet Poet

xo Min

Post by **sammy** » Wed Sep 23, 2009 5:49 pm

Poet - It was already said, but we are all supposed to help each other however we can. So never feel you have to do it all on your own!
More
{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

LOVE!!!
Sammy

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