trying to stay positive

[blaynelannan]

I don’t even know where to start, so I guess I will just write. I was inspired to sit down at this keyboard, so here goes.

What a rollercoaster this whole awakening process has been. I thought I was going to be retired by now, finishing my first book somewhere on Oahu or Maui, rubbing elbows with Wayne Dyer, and Deepak Chopra.

I envisioned getting an advance on a book, or winning the lottery, etc…that would set in motion all the resources I need, coming together to allow me the time and freedom to teach and share my ideas.

I was told from “spirit”, through a variety of sources and synchronicity that I am here to teach Law of Attraction in a big way through my experience and addiction to cocaine. How I went from a gun carrying parole officer to a drug addict, to going to jail, to getting stabbed, to having a gun to my back, to a series of miracles, after I completely surrendered, still baffles me.

I was told I was to carry a similar message of peace as Ghandi, MLK, Jesus Christ, Mother Theresa, etc.

I went from being completely pro-war, a former army paratrooper, to believing the only way to peace is for enlightened individuals in each country to convince the world to completely disarm, and to live the Truth there is no lack.

The notion of lack and duality has all but destroyed this planet through war and greed, and it’s time for it to stop

I believe at the core of my soul we can achieve global world peace, through present moment awareness, living in the “now” and utilizing the Law of Attraction. It sounds simple, but to practice these principles is not a simple task.

On top of that, I am visited by celestials during meditation, and I see “spirits,” of people like MLK, JFK, Ghandi, etc. Lights have turned off in my house in front of my eyes, and I feel energy move through me. This is just a very small list of never used to happen to me before 7-1-07.

I wake up at times like 1:11, 12:21, 2:44, 3:33, and I am bombarded by 1111 prompts at least a hundred times a day in the way of cell phones, digital clocks in my car, and every car I get into at Hanson Motors, receipts, gas pumps, customer’s drivers licenses etc..etc

That is why I question why that at 17 months into this “radical awakening” I am still struggling to pay my bills.

I have heard people on this 1111 site talk about having financial miracles happen at the perfect moment, and I am prompted with 888, 999, and combinations of that number that tell me financial abundance is on its way, that will allow me to complete this crazy spiritual path I have found myself on.

Then I wait, and wonder, and hope, and visualize, and meditate, and month in and out I am tested to my limit. Sometimes I get to the point of giving up. I feel like I want to cry, and I do at times. Then I will see, hear, or experience something that is magical that places me back in present moment awareness.

I go from complete bliss and knowing, to complete fear. I try not to stay in fear to long. Sometimes its difficult when I have a physical reality that contradicts what I know to be truth.

Any advice, encouragement, words of wisdom, etc, is appreciated.

Namaste

blayne

[MichelleP]

Hi Blayne,

The way I understand the law of attraction is we get what we focus on. You have been doing positive things to try to attract success but are you possibly still focused on lack? Fear is tough to let go of. I know with me I am very positive when I have work and a pay check is coming in but when I am out of work or the money isn't great I get worried about going broke. It is easy to fall into it. This is when we have to pull out faith and trust that the universe will provide. Easier said than done but the important thing is to let go of the results. Let go of needing something to happen and let it unfold as it should and more than likely it will unfold to our benefit. But we have to let it happen when most of the time when we are in fear we have this underlining trying to make it happen. This is what trips us up. Trying to will life to go our way. When this happens to me I first try to resolve the fear. Go through what is the worst that could happen and then think through how I would handle it. Now knowing I have a game plan if the worst occurs I simply start setting goals. I decide what I want to happen and when I want it to happen by and if it doesn't happen what are my next steps. A few years ago I didn't work for a whole year. I was almost out of money and I simply stated to the universe something needs to happen in my chosen field or I am moving on. And wouldn't you know it not long after that I wound up getting two jobs and more work than I could handle. I probably made in one year what I would have in the two so it all indeed did work out. And it will work out for you too. Maybe not how you envisioned it but it will work out. Now go set some firm goals and let setting yourself to working to get them happening be your only focus. Much success to you my friend.

Love,
Michelle

[Sandy]

Hi Blayne,
Your post struck a chord in my heart because I have been where you are so many times..fighting off fear and worry when things seem to close in.

I believe at the core of my soul we can achieve global world peace, through present moment awareness, living in the “now” and utilizing the Law of Attraction. It sounds simple, but to practice these principles is not a simple task.

It isn't simple that's for sure... but in my opinion, true bliss and happiness springs from the Universe Source or God. Think about these great visionaries and people of peace who visit you in meditation...Each of them in their own way put all their "eggs" in the basket of God's love...They learned to walk talk and listen with faith and trust in every moment of their lives. It is in a greater friendship and growing closeness with our Creator, something that transcends this world that we truly understand what real peace and tranquility is within and around us and we discover that all we desire is wrapped up in that one moment with God.
I am certainly not there yet and have a long way to travel...but I want you to know that I believe in your dream and what you are called to do in your time here on earth. When you feel the troubles closing in on you...remember your greatest goals and picture the results... a world where all men and women live in peace where there is no more hunger or want...a place where disease is on the wane and patience and understanding a way of life. It will happen just as you desire and I believe bit by bit the road will open before you. You will most certainly have help both seen and unseen along the way.

I am quite new to the principles of the law of attraction and I found Michelle's words to be very helpful. Thanks Michelle! It is so easy to focus on lack instead of the allowing. And oh my, am I so guilty of not letting go of the results. But living in this world is a wonderful opportunity for growth and learning don't you think? ...and it's never too late to let go and live in the now and life to the fullest. So here we go again...

Blayne, I pray you will have great success in everything you desire in your amazing life. God bless you always!
Love,
Sandy