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I first read a few of Heather's articles published here and there on the web. She has a brilliant take on opening the heart and using that to 'hold space' for other people. Here's one of those articles...
What It Means to “Hold Space” for People – Plus Eight Tips On How To Do It Well — by Heather Plett
Today I 'found' her web site and discovered a motherlode of articles looking at this subject from many angles. One that riveted my attention was about the opposite of 'holding space'.
The opposite of holding space is emotional colonization.
Wikipedia describes colonization as “an ongoing process by which a central system of power dominates the surrounding land and its components (people).” Colonization involves overpowering, dominating, and taking away the autonomy and sovereignty of other people. Normally we think of colonization as the controlling and exploiting of physical resources (land, bodies, natural resources, etc.). When I worked in international non-profit several years ago, I also witnessed the emergence of the term intellectual colonization, which is what happens when those in power control and exploit intellectual resources.
Emotional colonization is the act of controlling and exploiting someone’s emotional resources.
While holding space involves supporting without judging, fixing, or controlling the outcome, emotional colonization involves manipulating, disempowering, and judging.
When we hold space, we liberate. When we emotionally colonize, we violate. When we hold space, we leave the person feeling supported and empowered. When we emotionally colonize, we leave the person disenfranchised and weakened.
What’s the opposite of holding space? Emotional colonization. — by Heather Plett
Wow! That's a lot to think about.... Thanks Welles...I don't think one read is enough to take this one in. It's a very thought invoking and well written article.
Sandy
“We measure and evaluate your Spiritual Progress on the Wall of Eternity." – Guardian of Destiny, Alverana.
Well, I must admit I have a long history of dis-empowering, and judging myself.(using two of the words above associated with emotionally colonisation...) So much so that as a lesson in point in my AC library I was allowed to meet my inner child, seeing her as a little young me who was not very happy with me at the time. Those ways of being result from childhood and are very easy to drift into and remain if not vigilant. I am trying to rewire the pathways though, building better thought processes of respect understanding and even love for little ole me with all my often silly baggage. I am a work in process... may take a while but some day I hope to get there.(Obviously, I need to reread in its' entirety the above article/essay. )
love,
Sandy
“We measure and evaluate your Spiritual Progress on the Wall of Eternity." – Guardian of Destiny, Alverana.
Good luck with that Sandy! I reflected that I definitely colonize myself a lot (insecurities/doubts/negativities/judgements towards others). I was also reflecting how Jesus was probably that perfectly uncolonized person which would have impacted people a lot.
When it comes to getting things done, I think we need to observe the energy flow coming through us. Sometimes it is hard when we have to push, under pressure. My Adjuster (and guidance team) is helping me find more natural ways to supply work and effort with good energy. It is hard to know when it is time to "squeeze blood from a rock" or when it is time to stop and rest. Unfortunately my medication can dull my brain, making it harder to push when I need to.
It is indeed.
And one thing, it is so different for each of us....I've noticed sometimes something troubling me and my efforts comes easily to another. Of course from the inside looking out it may have taken a great deal of effort for another. LOL ai yi yi. Sometimes these mountains of self that I feel I am trying to climb seem insurmountable and at other times I think I have reached the summit only to find I step into a chasm. LOL Still I realise that at those "chasm times" I have been trying to do it by myself... not allowing for those "good energies..."Divine energies" to flow through me... It is always helpful to use the resources available for us, eh?
I feel good this morning...It's nice to know I am not alone having brothers and sisters of human and divine associations who understand walking hand in hand. All is well in my world.
Love,
Sandy
“We measure and evaluate your Spiritual Progress on the Wall of Eternity." – Guardian of Destiny, Alverana.
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It is indeed.