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Love vs. Attachment — by Jack Kornfield

Posted: Tue Nov 21, 2017 6:12 pm
by Welles
"The near enemy of love is attachment. Attachment masquerades as love. It says, “I will love this person because I need them.” Or, “I’ll love you if you’ll love me back. I’ll love you, but only if you will be the way I want.” This isn’t love at all – it is attachment – and unhealthy attachment is rigid; it is very different from love. When there is attachment, there is clinging and fear. Love allows, honors, and appreciates; attachment grasps, demands, needs, and aims to possess. If we examine our attachment with compassion, we can see how it is constricted and conditional; it offers love only to certain people in certain ways—it is exclusive. Love, in the sense of metta, used by the Buddha, is a universal, non-discriminating feeling of caring and connectedness."

Love vs. Attachment — by Jack Kornfield

https://jackkornfield.com/love-vs-attachment/

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Re: Love vs. Attachment — by Jack Kornfield

Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2017 5:10 am
by happyrain
Hi Welles I have more commentary from Hazrat Inayat Khan to share. Yesterday’s, “bowl of saki” seemed to relate in a way to the quote you’ve posted above

Commentary by Pir-o-Murshid Inayat Khan

There are two stages of workers. The first stage is that of the one who works for himself; the higher stage of working is to work for others. The one who rises above the stage of working for himself comes to the stage of working for others, bringing in their lives the blessing which is the need of their lives. To what does the love of God lead? It leads to that peace and stillness which can be seen in the life of the tree which flowers and bears fruit for others and expects no return. Peace will not come to the lover's heart so long as he will not become love itself.

from http://wahiduddin.net/mv2/XIV/XIV_5.htm


A person is apt to think, 'Why should I perform actions that bring me no return? Why should I be kind, where no kindness is shown to me, where there is even no appreciation?' In this way he commercializes his kindness: he gives in order to receive. ... When one loves one must love for the sake of love, not for a return. When one serves one must serve for the sake of service, not for acknowledgement. In everything a person does, if he does not think of reciprocity or appreciation in any manner or form, he may perhaps seem a loser in the beginning, but in the end that person will be the gainer, for he has lived in the world and yet held himself above the world; it cannot touch him.

from http://wahiduddin.net/mv2/VIII/VIII_2_28.htm



~~~ Enviable is he who loveth and asketh no return.

Re: Love vs. Attachment — by Jack Kornfield

Posted: Sat Dec 09, 2017 12:00 am
by Welles
happyrain wrote: Thu Dec 07, 2017 5:10 am Hi Welles I have more commentary from Hazrat Inayat Khan to share. Yesterday’s, “bowl of saki” seemed to relate in a way to the quote you’ve posted above.

Yep. I'd say they are similar themes from different cultural bases. That suggests an increase in commonality as we approach unity I believe.

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