World Views

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.cnn.com/videos/world/2020/0 ... h-orig.cnn

"Doctors pull entire beach towel out of (Monty) python's mouth"

Lesson: Fuzzy, two-dimensional fruit is probably not fruit! ...
even if it smells like fruit (after a beach picnic?).

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/w ... settlement

"William Shatner and his ex-wife Elizabeth Martin have divied up their assets and it looks like the award-winning actor is walking away with the former couple's supply of horse semen (and) the actor scoring two of their four horses, Renaissance Man's Medici and Powder River Shirley, while (Elizabeth) Martin will get Belle Reve's So Photogenic and Pebbles."

Later, Shatner will give some of the swimmers to a vet who'll announce:
"I'm Givin' Her All She's Got, Captain!"

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.foxnews.com/auto/drunk-uber-1700-ride

"Drunk Uber rider taken for $1,700 ride across the UK"

"The bill ended up being 1,307.64 pounds, but when the driver figured out what happened he decided not to charge him for the trip.
James gave him a five-star rating for the generous gesture and then got on a train home."

Great response from the driver! ... but shouldn't the trip have been questioned when starting,
especially if the rider was known to be drunk?

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.cnn.com/travel/article/ital ... index.html

"For a few hours Wednesday, residents of the northern Italian town of Castelvetro realized they could have their Lambrusco
not just from bottles -- but also from their faucets and shower heads."

Might also be good for the mold around bathtubs!
(usually, I just drink the wine when soakin' in the suds)

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/articl ... nding.html

"SpaceX's Falcon 9 rocket blasts off to the International Space Station with supplies in spectacular night-time launch -
before nailing its 50th booster landing at Cape Canaveral"

100 landings and it will qualify as "just commuting to space and back."

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.cnn.com/style/article/red-l ... index.html

"Suffrage leaders Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Charlotte Perkins Gilman loved red lipstick for its ability to shock men,
and protesters donned the bold color en masse, adopting it as a sign of rebellion and liberation."

Other colors have long competed but black & blue lips have never been popular,
at least not to wear ... but maybe to apply (to someone else).

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/articl ... stria.html

"The mouse, who emerged in a forest area in Vienna, bounds towards the camera ...
With a newly-found nut between its teeth"

Makes good advertisement for nuts (and seeds), human nutrition as well!

See also: https://www.wikihow.com/Use-Acorns-for-Food

Rod

[Amigoo]

The bucket woman (not Hyacinth)*

Re: https://www.foxnews.com/us/north-caroli ... thday-wish

"North Carolina police arrested a 100-year-old woman at her nursing home Thursday,
and she was able to cross going to jail off her bucket list." (a birthday gag)

[comments] "Cool story, why the gay cake?"
"Because back in the day gay meant happy and jolly."

How do you know the cake is not "gay" (modern term)?
The icing on top puts the red layer on the bottom:
See: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rainbow_flag

*About Hyacinth: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGt-jvU5Iag

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/08/us/hand- ... index.html

"The 60s: 'My Girl' by The Temptations"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=swSytFVMHuU

These lyrics do not necessarily refer to virus symptoms:
"What can make me feel this way? My girl!"

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-03-06/ ... e/12031070

"Family accidentally orders 12 years' worth of toilet paper"
"meant to order 48 rolls, instead ordered 48 boxes (2304 rolls)"

Let's do the TMI math ....
12 x 12 = 144 months, 2304 / 144 = 16 rolls per month
16 / 5 family members = 3.2 rolls per month per member

18 year's worth if only one female in the family ...
according to the old guy at the end of the bar.

Rod

[Amigoo]

"BS for Dummies"

Proposed new self-help book.

Chapter One: "Be Something ... anything!"
Chapter Two: "On Being Stupid."
Chapter Three: "Be Something else."

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech ... likes.html

"'Humans are just outlandishly social animals, and that goes back to these deep forces that selected for maximising information,
information that would have been useful for living in a hunter-gatherer society 30,000 years ago and earlier."

"Anthropologists have long-known that modern hunter-gatherers trade ostrich eggshell beads to cement their interpersonal relationships —
with such being practised among living Bushman groups in the Kalahari Desert."

Who knew Ostrich eggshell beads were the original calling card for friendly trade ...
sharp spears, probably, for the unfriendly commerce.

Rod

[Amigoo]

The poop on poop ...

Re: https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/09/health/t ... index.html

"The psychology behind why toilet paper, of all things, is the latest coronavirus panic buy"

Actually, there aren't good substitutes for wiping, post-poop.
Besides, if you got a roll you can go anywhere (or many places).
And has great shelf life (maybe not as good as a fast food burger)

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://pagesix.com/2020/03/09/snctms-l ... ronavirus/

"The company is going through the appropriate measures to sanitize the venues, screening those who plan on attending,
and supplying extra soap and sanitizer with instructions about how to use them properly"

Probably a good time to opt for the virtual orgy ... in your own home.

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/10/health/e ... index.html
"To eat, or not to eat breakfast -- that is the question"

"The morning meal can boost energy, control cravings and weight, and improve focus and performance."

However, combining breakfast and lunch ("brunch") is an option
if late-night food is still digesting at breakfast time.

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.dailystar.co.uk/real-life/w ... s-21669320

"Whispers, smiles, double-takes, outright laughing, flirting, gasps, eye rolls, thumbs up, free beers, looks of disgust,
strange propositions, chuckling, handshakes, people pulling at my clothes to peek underneath, high fives, looks of horror."

Considering the discomfort required for a tattoo, what's underneath is probably a natural color.

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.foxnews.com/food-drink/kfcs ... s-outbreak

"KFC's 'finger lickin' good' ad called 'irresponsible' by viewers during coronavirus outbreak"

Probably diners who prefer Popeye's (or whatever).
KFC can counter with "WTF?" ("did you Wash The Fingers?")

Entrepreneur Alert
A "WTF?" sticker will be very popular these days!
(KFC, et al., can make this a customer option)

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/food ... ghead.html

"After experts traced the history of sirloin steaks we look at who Granny Smith really was
and why avocados are named after the Aztec word for testicle"

"The French for avocado is 'avocat', which is also the word for a lawyer (an advocate),
and this is why a poorly translated menu in Switzerland once offered 'half a lawyer with prawns'."

Despite large Aztecs , if you prefer mashed avocado on toast, freeze unpeeled lawyers
to preserve them, then thaw one overnight (at room temperature if eating for breakfast).

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.cnn.com/travel/article/huma ... index.html

"Animals get access to 95% of the land, and humans the remaining 5% -- in hotels"

I thought that human zoos already existed, in places called "city" ...
but these animals watch each other and sometimes act like real animals.

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://babylonbee.com/news/nations-ner ... -forbidden

"To prepare for the onslaught of the deadly disease, nerds are changing absolutely nothing and are expected to rise up
to rule the post-Coronavirus society, as they are the ones best adjusted to being sheltered in a basement, garage,
or room for many days at a time"

"Of course, many nerds are running out of hygienic products, but they say that's 'not an issue.' "

"Nerdopia" comes to mind.

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/arti ... chest.html

"Heartbreaking moment the grieving mother of a 15-year-old who took her own life
hears her daughter's heart beating in another teenage girl's chest after a life-saving transplant"

"Her selfless actions saved the life of Brooklyn Konerman, now 16, who was in a desperate need of a new heart after being born
with a rare defect called hypoplastic left heart syndrome, which means the left side of the heart doesn't develop.

... and the beat goes on

Rod

[Sandy]

That was a special story, Rod.
It hits home for us as our board friend, Laura, had a heart transplant a couple weeks ago. While we are so happy for her, it was also bittersweet knowing some other family i grieving their loss.
But A beautiful ending...or a beginning in a way as the families have found a powerful connection.
Thanks for sharing this.
xxSandy

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/arti ... chest.html

It's fascinating that a mother, who gave life to her daughter,
would still have biological connection to that life, now transplanted.

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://pagesix.com/2020/03/19/anthony- ... -pandemic/

"While spending time at home amid the coronavirus pandemic — in what his rep told us is a 'totally voluntary and preventative'
self-quarantine — the Oscar winner is playing piano for the feline ('Niblo')"

"Play it again, Sam"

Rod

[Amigoo]

Re: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/articl ... virus.html

"Catholic Church forgives the sins of worshippers affected by coronavirus"

At least, knowing that one's church forgives should be comforting during illness.

Rod