Dear all
Thank you
to each and everyone off you, and board moderators, for inviting me with such warmth, compassion, understanding, empathy, and love into your circle off light. Thank for taking the time to suggest and pray. I havent been well, and I've been very depressed, anxious and overwhelmed
I have also tried posting a thank you response, but there is something on my computer stopping me from letting my post be posted.
Its very frusterating. First off, I want to explain that I'm hurting very badly, as I'm spiritual, and not like everyone else. I came from the west, where it was neutral, near the pacific ocean
, and had my group off friends that accepted me for who I was. They didnt care that I was spiritual or different.
I was forced to leave my childhood friends behind 0ver 20 yrs ago, and move here to the big city, where the upper class society and style off living was to shocking and overwhelming for my frail mind and body. This sent me into the most horrific depression one could ever experience.
Being lonely and missing what I will never get back. Not fitting in the female society and being looked at as weid in the eyes off upper class males here. THey went out of their way to make me feel very very ugly. I felt so ugly, that sent into into a depression too.
I didnt even make it through university, due to horrific depression and overwhelming anxiety and frail mind, body and soul, from being placed in the wrong toxic enviroment. I was dead inside and numb. eastern ways off dealing with this all wasnt introduced to me yet.
It wasnt until 2005 that I encountered my first real near death experience, and paranormal experience with the other side. It was may or June off that year, where I was chronically depressed and at the end off my rope. I was almost out off my body, and with my third
eye saw an angel
.
Since that day, that angel
has given me hope
, and kept me alive with hope. Since that day I have come to see electric blue flashes, pink, green, aqua, and voilet with my third eye. Other spiritual people have told me its angels and energy from the other side sending me energies off flashes, when I become overwhelmed with anxiety
, and get overstimulated and anxious, and stressed.
I have also combined western and eastern ways and techniques off trying my best to deal with the situation that I've been handed. Its not easy at all. I have learned since I have also learned I'm a number 11 which I learned last year was also a spiritual number and has a spiritual purpose in life, just like princess diana was number 11. I have read all the books out there on the book shelves, but nothing in the western society has helped. Then I went into new age, and that helped more then western altogether.
I have started to use eastern skills and techniques to deal with what i've been handed in life, and with this horrific situation i'm in, the shocking depression, that has blocked my creativity, and my ability to climb the latter, and the horrifix anxiety that I shake like a leaf from every day and night, I'm very frail
from whats happend to me.
I know I'm meant to be a childrens writer and bring healing into the world just like sark, has done. I know I'm meant to bring healing
to other children and others, and through my future work and writing, and hope and healing into the world to make it a better place with compassion
. Its just frusterating, when i'm blocked out with depression, and shocking anxiety so bad, that I cant focus and think straight. Its heartbreaking, and sad and frusterating.
I know I'm meant to do something big to heal and bring compassion
to others in the world and hope, but I'm blocked, and the depression has tormented me and blocked me in the most horrific way.
Again please Pray ANGELS SURROUND me tonight, and always, as I have tried myself to invoke them, but i cant, because i'm blocked. I cry
day and night and my mind and body is frail, so please, bless and also light a candle for me as well. Thank you
again for inviting me into your Circle off light, warmly Aquamarine
that the there is hope, and the things will get better. I'm very close to losing faith, and thats a huge thing, as I've been pretty good about keeping my faith strong no matter what this year. Please pray more angels come to me, surround me, and protect me. Love Aquamarine
.
there, is purely coincidental. Only his name has been retained in case anyone should ever need someone to incriminate... 
